One of my favorite books is "Start with Why" by Simon Sinek. The concept is simple: everything starts with why. The reason why you succeed should be tied to your why, the reason you start on a goal should be tied to your why, and the reason you do anything is tied to it. So often, we start with the outcome rather than the why.
This article isn't about a book, though. I just wanted you to know who Simon Sinek was before I launched into this story.
A few years ago, while working for a new boss, I found myself sitting in a conference room for an all-day strategy session for the sales function. We had leaders from various countries in the room coming together to discuss our sales function, compensation, revenue goals, and more. This new leader was there to drive it forward.
Within a few hours of spending time with this guy, I knew he wasn't for me. After a few hours of listening to him pull quotes out of thin air and attempting to prove he was the alpha dog in the room, I had started to zone out.
Then he said: "A few years ago, I was at the Four Seasons, and after a few days of having breakfast in the cafe, I noticed the same server was always in such a great mood, ready to serve, and I asked him why he was so happy all the time. The server proceeded to tell me about how the organization treated him so well, and how the management was always checking up on him, and gave him the support needed to do his job..."
About halfway through it, I started to perk up. That's a Simon Sinek story. He just plagiarized a Simon Sinek YouTube video, word for word, and played it as his own.
It was in this moment that this leader lost all credibility in my eyes. If they could rip off a story and try to pass it off as their own, they could lie about anything.
The point of this story isn't that I worked for a narcissist. The point is that you really have to be careful — some people will tell you whatever they need in order to gain perceived credibility or get your attention.
The majority of leaders out there are not great. There are a lot of leadership jobs, and there are few competent, well-trained leaders who are actually in it for their teams and people. So protect yourself, upskill yourself, and focus on what you can control.
At the end of the day, credibility matters more than charisma. You can fake a story, you can fake confidence, but you cannot fake trust. The leaders worth following are the ones who tell the truth, invest in their people, and earn your trust over time — not the ones who borrow someone else's story to look the part.
Do not blindly follow leaders just because they sound convincing. Anchor yourself in your own why, keep building your skills, and stay sharp enough to spot when someone is selling you something that isn't real.