I was a guest on a podcast yesterday. A podcast I don't feel like I was worthy of appearing on. And I'm not trying to be coy either.
This podcast is hosted by a guru, expert, author, known speaker, presenter, and consultant in the real estate industry. He's garnered himself quite a name over the last several years, often appearing on stages at various events and publishing data that the industry eats up. Simply put, he's created a brand for himself that people pay thousands of dollars to actually have access to and be in his presence.
He interviews titans of the industry, the CEOs, the influencers, and the people who really make real estate happen. Earlier this summer, he hosted a retreat with the "who's who" of the business, and the roster read like a Hall of Fame game for the weekend.
So when he asked me to appear on his podcast, I was a little shocked to be honest. I see myself as a well-connected guy in the industry, but when I look at the roster of names he's invited on in the past, I don't feel like I was on that short list.
But there's a moral to this story, and it started less than four years prior.
When I moved to Dubai, we connected on LinkedIn. I think he was fascinated with my move to the Middle East, as he had previously worked abroad as well. We exchanged notes on the industry, and being the networker I am, I kept in touch.
When I decided it was time to move back home, I pinged my network, him included, and he introduced me to the company I work for full-time today. A connection I'm grateful for, as it helped get my family back to the States, and got me an opportunity to work for a great organization.
When he called or messaged me asking my opinion, I called back, and when he invited me to a conference, I said I'll be there. I nurtured a relationship, and I said yes to opportunities, something that so few people do.
I wish I could just grab hold of you, the reader, in this moment, and stare deep into your eyes and shout at you, "JUST FUCKING SAY YES!"
I've seen this for years. People waver, they waffle, they hesitate, they second-guess, they overthink, and they overprocess. They just don't say yes enough. For whatever reason, the word yes is always second to no.
And it drives me bonkers in a way that makes me question how we even function as adults sometimes.
I wasn't asked to appear on this podcast because I'm such an expert or because I'm smarter than anyone else. I was asked because I had created a relationship with someone, cultivated and nurtured it, and ultimately added value to it, and said yes at every turn. As a result, I found myself sitting in front of a microphone, wearing headphones, talking about the real estate industry. Were there better people to ask? Absolutely. But I had created a pattern of showing up.
I know I'm a bit of a freak when it comes to networking, and I know I'm a bit of a reckless one when it comes to saying yes to things, but it's the main reason why I have had the career I've had. I'm not smarter than many people. I got a 690 on my SATs, which was barely passing. I got a 2.3 GPA in college. I'm not a scholar. So my not-so-secret secret to my success has been solely based on the idea of getting myself into rooms I probably didn't deserve to be in, and with people who I knew were better than me, all because I was willing to say yes.
Saying no is a disease. It's a weakness. It's a mindset. It's what you do when you're scared and afraid of the outcomes that you desperately seek. It's the shield you hold up because the possibility of losing feels louder than the possibility of winning. It's the shortcut to staying exactly where you are, even though you swear you're hungry for more. It's the quiet surrender that looks harmless on the outside but ends up costing you the life you keep pretending you want.
Saying yes is rarely about the moment itself. It's about what saying yes unlocks over time.
Every yes puts you in motion, places you in new rooms, connects you to new people, and exposes you to ideas you never would have found if you kept guarding your comfort. Yes builds a kind of momentum that compounds quietly in the background until one day you look around and realize your entire landscape has changed simply because you were willing to step forward when everyone else stayed put.
That's the real magic. Not the podcast invite or the conference badge or the dream opportunity that shows up years later. The real magic is how saying yes reshapes who you become. It teaches you to trust yourself, to back your instincts, to stay open to possibility rather than hiding behind fear dressed up as logic. Yes creates a pattern of movement that eventually rewrites your identity. And when your identity shifts, your opportunities shift with it.