The Fourth of July has come and gone, and a fun fact about Scott: I love fireworks. Unfortunately, where I live in Seattle, they are illegal. So every few years, when we're back in my hometown in Eastern Washington, we're able to buy a few hundred dollars' worth of fireworks and catch things on fire.
I don't know what it is about fireworks that brings out the little kid in me, but I assume it has something to do with letting my guard down and forgetting about whatever stresses I have in my life at the moment. It's hard to be uptight and thinking about work when you're using a small blow torch to shoot all sorts of shit in the air while it sparkles and lights up the night.
Relaxing is something I've struggled with my entire career. The idea of slowing down and just resting isn't something I do well. It's just the way I've been wired, but it's probably a sickness. For some reason, I've always thought that if I put the laptop away for too long, then I'm missing out on doing something that could further my career or my skill set that could ultimately lead to me becoming more marketable, earning more money, and/or getting further ahead in my career.
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It's a sickness I know.
The problem is that you can spend your entire life trying to get ahead and forget to actually enjoy the life you're trying to build. You tell yourself that you're grinding for freedom, flexibility, security, options, and a better future, but then the future shows up for a weekend, a holiday, a vacation, or a random Tuesday night with your family, and you don't know how to be present for it.
You sit there physically in the room, but mentally you're still checking email, thinking about the call from earlier, replaying the interview, stressing about the client, or trying to solve some imaginary problem that probably won't matter in three days. Your body is sitting in the lawn chair watching fireworks, but your brain is still sitting at your desk trying to finish one more thing.
It's like you're constantly putting yourself in work jail.
At some point, you have to realize that rest is not the enemy of ambition. Letting loose for a night doesn't mean you've lost your edge. Taking a weekend off doesn't mean everyone else just passed you. Laughing, eating too much, staying up late, watching fireworks, playing cards, going to the lake, or sitting around with people you love isn't wasted time. It might be the entire point of working so hard in the first place.
The hard part for high-achieving people is that relaxing can feel irresponsible. You almost feel guilty when you're not being productive. You feel like you should be reading, writing, networking, applying, building, improving, optimizing, or doing something that sounds impressive when you say it out loud. The truth is, sometimes the most productive thing you can do is shut the hell up, put the phone down, and be a normal human being for a few hours.
Your brain needs room to breathe. Your body needs a break from being in fight-or-flight mode. Your family and friends need the version of you that isn't half-listening while mentally answering a Slack message. You need to remember that your identity can't only be tied to what you produce, what you earn, what title you have, or what goal you're chasing next.
That is what I love about fireworks.
For a few hours, nobody is talking about career growth, job searches, business plans, revenue targets, LinkedIn posts, or whatever else usually occupies my head. It's just fire, noise, smoke, little kids laughing, adults acting like little kids, and everyone looking up at the same sky for a few minutes instead of looking down at their phones.
So maybe the lesson is simple. Work hard, care deeply, chase the thing, build the life, and take your career seriously, but every once in a while, let yourself step away from all of it.
Next year, buy the fireworks. Light the fuse. Watch the sky. Forget about your stress for a few hours and remind yourself that life is not just something you're supposed to manage, optimize, and survive. It's also something you're supposed to enjoy.