Six months ago, there was probably something in your life or career that felt much harder than it does today. Maybe you were starting a new job, looking for a new job, dealing with a difficult boss, trying to make a big decision, or working through something personally that felt like it was consuming all of your energy. At the time, it probably felt huge. Today, you may look back at it and wonder why it felt so overwhelming.
That is what experience does to us. Every difficult conversation, bad meeting, hard decision, mistake, setback, and uncomfortable situation gives us something we can use the next time around. You may barely realize it is happening because you are usually too busy dealing with whatever is directly in front of you.
Then six months go by, and you are a different person.
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The problem is that we spend so much time looking forward that we rarely take the time to look backward. We think about where we want to be, the goals we still have, the promotion we want, the money we want to make, or the things we still want to accomplish. We keep measuring ourselves against some future version of ourselves instead of looking at how much has already changed.
Think about the things you can handle today that would have made you nervous six months ago. Think about the conversations that have become easier. Think about the decisions you can make faster because you have seen something similar before. Think about the problems you know how to solve today because six months ago you had absolutely no idea what you were doing.
That is the value of experience. The first time you go through something, it can feel terrifying. The second time, you recognize a few things. The third time, you know what questions to ask and what mistakes to avoid. Eventually, something that once caused you a ton of stress becomes just another problem you know how to deal with.
Confidence comes from having enough experiences where you can look back and say, “I’ve dealt with something like this before.”
This is also where confidence really comes from. Confidence comes from having enough experiences where you can look back and say, “I’ve dealt with something like this before.” You already have evidence that you can figure things out. You already know you can get through difficult moments. Every time you do, you add another experience to draw from the next time something gets hard.
The funny part is that you may feel less strong today because you are tired. You may feel frustrated with where you are. You may feel behind. You may even wonder why things still feel hard when you have already been through so much. But being stronger doesn’t mean things suddenly become easy. It means you have more tools, more perspective, and more experience to deal with whatever shows up next.
Every once in a while, take a second and look at the person you were six months ago. Think about what you were worried about, what you were trying to figure out, and what felt impossible at the time. There is a good chance you are stronger today than you were then. You have simply been so focused on what comes next that you forgot to give yourself credit for everything you have already learned.